Death, Dying and Bereavement

Just last week, 21st of April, during HSBH1006 (Foundations of Health Science) we were given a lecture on death, dying and bereavement for 2 hours long.

I've decided to bring this up because lately, I have been hearing a couple of unfortunate incidents where my friends experience sorrow and grief when their family members or friends had, or still are, experience a health-related issue. In regards to their health, it would be wise to leave it to the professionals or specialists in that field. Rather, I would like to talk about the patient, and their family and friends, when they've realised that they're going to die. We have learnt about the 5 stages of dying, suggested by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross (1960s), and they were: 

1. Denial;
2. Anger;
3. Bargaining;
4. Depression; and finally
5. Acceptance

Although there were problems about this theory, it became the foundation and encouragement for present, and future, health researchers to continue dwelling into the process of dying, along with the process of grieving. Many theories about grieving all suggested that people eventually move on from the past however, recent studies suggested the opposite. Silverman and Klass (1996) came up with the 'Continuing Bonds' thesis where the survivors experienced a continuous bond with the dead. It's suggested that grieving occurred because it's based on a framework of interdependence where people intimately involved their lives with others and when those people become deceased, it might lead to a loss in one's self. Marwit and Klass (1994-5) suggested a notion of inner representations as a part of the 'normal' grieving process; in a sense it allowed people to continue to interact with the dead:

"while the intensity of the relationship with the deceased may diminish with time, the relationship does not disappear. We are not talking about living in the past, but rather recognizing how bonds formed in the past can inform our present and our future." - Silverman & Klass 1996:17.

The Continuing bonds thesis suggested that:

• People should not be encouraged to seek 'closure,'
• Bereavement is an on-going process of negotiation and meaning-making,
• The significance of loss and place of the dead in the lives of survivors will be continually negotiated as feelings lessen or intensify.

I can't say I complete understand the grief that people experience when a loved one is deceased, though I have experienced something similar; my first dog, Twister, died from a hit and run. This is one of the reasons why I chose to work in the health science field; I would like to increase my knowledge in health-related issues and hopefully, be able to help those who are suffering; leading them to a better life that they deserve.